Disha Murugupandiyan - Week #16: Nostalgia

I hate that my memory is so selective.

I hate that I can remember exactly what I said in that embarrassing conversation a week ago and not what the integral of an arctan function is.


I hate that I can remember exactly how it feels to get your first D on a high school test and not what the name of that song playing on the radio is.


I hate that I can remember exactly where in my notes I wrote about a specific topic and not what it said.


I hate that I can remember exactly how it feels to sprain my ankle while playing soccer and not what I needed to buy to make sure I didn’t run out of it.


I hate that I can remember what a sour grape tastes like and not what the ice cream I had in London tasted like since it was genuinely some of the best ice cream I have ever had. 


I hate that I can remember exactly when I lost that really important thing but not where I lost that really important thing.


Yet, I love that I can remember how it feels to bite into a cold piece of watermelon and not how it felt to trip over something like a stick or a crack in the road.


I love that I can remember the games I played with my old childhood friends and not how it feels to get a vaccine shot.


I love that I can remember how it feels to play volleyball (muscle memory at its finest), and not how it feels to burn my knee when diving for a ball. 


I love that I can remember what it was like to go to my favorite artist’s concert due to the videos that I have and not what it is like to not get tickets to their concert.


I love that I can remember every lyric to my favorite songs and not what it feels like to forget my speech in the middle of giving it. 


I love remembering. 





Comments

  1. Casmin BuiMay 27, 2026 at 7:45 PM

    Hi Disha! I really like this style of writing that you used for this blog! This reminds me of a TikTok that was really relatable, which explained that our reactions for test scores are very biased depending on what percentages we get. For good scores, our brains usually don’t remember them because they’re expected, or the “norm”. But for those bad scores that occur once every blue moon, we usually remember those the most vividly, just like how you mention your first D on a high school test. I still remember getting my first failing score in 7th grade math class, which was a 5/10. Needless to say, it didn’t impact my grade much, but it kept me on edge for a while.

    I love how random our memories can be sometimes! Just like the ice cream you had back in London, it feels like sometimes we don’t remember the unique vacations or trips that we had, even if it was the best vacation ever. Why is that? The same goes for dreams as well. Sometimes, they do make logical sense according to what we see in the real world, but sometimes they can go out of pocket really fast. I can relate a lot to the notes!! I also mentioned this in a previous blog comment two or so weeks ago, but for VFA quizzes, I also find myself remembering where the word was in the groups of 10 words that we learn (each lesson). How do you deal with this issue? I think it’s really interesting how only some of us can relate, because it really shows how different our methods of learning and studying are.

    I think that despite the memories that we keep whether good or bad, they define part of our character and what makes us who we are. After all, it’s about the memories we make and which we choose to hold onto as we move forward in life. Thank you for this wonderful blog, Disha! Have a wonderful summer!

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  2. Atharv DuaMay 27, 2026 at 8:47 PM

    Let’s all take a moment to collectively thank the ap calculus exam gods for barely testing trig identities on the AP tests (can someone also slide the strategies for somehow remembering the trig identities for integrals). Disha, the selective memory you described through such vivid imagery is likely, according to a study by Dr. Waring at Boston College, impacted heavily by emotions you experienced at the time. Also, thanks to our phones, we’re able to have memories of certain events/places through photos and videos, which, as you mentioned through your “favorite artist’s concert,” can help us remember them clearly years later. In your writing, I think your use of juxtaposition is extremely effective and your anaphora is very well used: both of them structure your blog quite well. Thank you for a fantastic piece!

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  3. Acintya ShenoyMay 27, 2026 at 10:00 PM

    I love that you wrote about nostalgia, Disha! To me, it’s one of the most intriguing and complex emotions that a human can experience. This poem explores the complexity of nostalgia really well by displaying the differing attitudes that a person can hold towards their memories. The speaker remembers various aspects of their life, good or bad, and still ends up concluding that they “love remembering.” It’s poetic that we can crave something we dislike; for example, marching band season is always a tough time of the year for me. Multi-hour practices 3–4 times per week, sweltering 8-hour days at band camp, band drama, worrying about being behind schedule…there are so many things stressing me out all the time. In fact, my hair loss actually gets worse during the band season, from July to December. However, once the season ends, I weirdly end up missing it. I remember all the fun I had with my friends—hanging out before competitions, getting food together, complaining about the heat or drill together, and celebrating wins together. This simultaneously positive and negative view of marching band, in my opinion, gives me a sense of nostalgia whenever I think of a past season. I think you portrayed that feeling really well in this poem. Great job, Disha!

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